Last Night was a Nightmare05:25 Jun 30 2008
Times Read: 593
Well... basically, last night was a nightmare. I guess I'll spill my guts out here... like I normally do, hah.
Anyway, last night I rode with Jones so that we could take Derick to work at Waffle House. It was storming really bad and when we got there, it was flooded, so we dropped him off and right before we left the electricity went out. That's not the reason for the bad night though, that's just the before events...
Well, we get back to the houes, electricity is still working there, and Mike, Teresa and Jim were all drinking, already drunk. Darien was there and I think he maybe had a buzz. Krystal was there and she didn't feel like drinking. Mike wanted me to drink, and I really didn't feel like it seeing as everyone else was already drunk, so I wanted to stay sober, especially since Derick wasn't there.
No big deal though, I have a little to drink to appease Mike, because he was getting very upset, and I didn't want him to get upset because he tends to then begin a rollercoaster up, and if you can't stop it, the coaster will reach the top, begin for its plunge down, and then there's no stopping it.
So he bites the fuck out of my arm and it hurts like hell, but again, no big deal, just try to keep my distance a little because when he's drunk, I know he probably doesn't mean to, but he inflicts pain a lot in tiny different ways.
I decide to go to my room and play God of War II, mind my own business, and Krystal joins me seeing as we both don't want to drink. Mike comes into the room after a few minutes. He's obviously drunk. He gets dangerously close to the HDTV ($500 credit card charge still not paid off) and I worry he may knock it off the dresser, or he may step on the PS2. No offence to him, I just know he's clumsy when he drinks. Shit, I know I knock over shit and tend to be extra clutsy when I drink, and I've seen that he is too.
So, he starts running around back and forth from my room to his room, talking about how bad he has to piss, and Darien's in the bathroom. The rollercoast starts going UP at a frightening pace. He pisses on the damn door, then start yelling and screaming that Darien wouldn't let him in the bathroom on purpose. Okay. Problem number one. Answer: You can't assume Darien's doing that shit on purpose, and whether he is or not, suck it up and go piss the fuck outside. All of us in this house have had to piss outside at one point or another, you've done it plenty before, so why are you gonna try and piss threw the keyhole?!
So, whatever again, I try to blow it off, don't want his roller coaster to keep rising, so I do my best to talk sense to him, and tell him its over now, calm down. Then he yell's at me "Why don't you ever take my side?!" That hurt me so much. I have taken his side on things, but how am I there? He doesn't know about the bathroom situation, he can't see through walls, shit! There's been so many times I have backed him up, protected him in conversations, talked people into giving him another chance. So many chances...
He's had this anger issue for awhile. This isn't the first time he's lost it.... This will just be the last time (we kicked him out, though yes it saddens me, I can't handle this shit anymore.). I keep asking him to please get out of my room, I'm scared my shit will get broken, is that wrong of me? I tried my best to say it in the nicest way possible... I just wanted to be honest with him. He does crazy everywhere, I'm not even going to put in all the details, but the roller coaster went over the top and started rushing DOWN.
He tries to pick a fight with Darien, hits Darien quite a few times, and he doesn't fight back considering they have a no contact order and aren't even suppose to be around eachother. They have a court date over that matter in the next few days because of a fight they had before (where Derick and I had to call the cops. I still remember the phone cord around his neck... I get flashbacks of it and it's just so hard...)
He flips the dining room table over sending alcohol and drinks and all kinds of shit EVERYWHERE. Jones picks the table back up. Everyone's trying to calm Mike down, to no avail. I don't even know what caused the rest, it's splotchy because I was an emotional wreck, crying (I'm such a crybaby, god...) and I think I was switching between people in my head or maybe seizures were trying to come on? I don't know, hard to explain. I guess that's not important though.
Mike "grapples me" I'm not sure what he's trying to do, so I try to get away because I'm scared and I just want him to calm down. Hard to get away but I do. Mike, yelling and screaming the whole time, begins saying so many hurtful insults about my husband and I. Truly hurtful... Aparently I'm a fucking whore, and so is everybody else. Then I'm in the dining room, and Mike kicked the table across the room at me, it hits me, almost knocking me off my feet. Then he "grapples me" (as he puts it to Darien) to the ground, Darien pulls him off of me, Mike pulling my hair and me across the room at the same time (intentional or unintentional I don't know) and Krystal helps me up. I run out the back door and come around to the front yard, hide behind my truck. Darien leaves incase the cops come, because he doesn't want them to try and stick any shit on him, which I understand. I have Jones's phone and use it to call Derick. Krystal already called him for me, told him Mike had hit me and was tearing up the house, going crazy... I call him and he's already on the way, Bizsnatchbitch is taking him home.
Derick arrives, he told bitchsnatch to take me away, and I wouldn't go, he runs into the house, I run after him, he has Mike on the floor, Mike throws my phone at Derick, and Derick basically, to put it bluntly, beats his ass. Mike gets up grabs MY fucking phone, and takes off down the road in the pouring rain. Well, cops arrive. Derick, Krystal, and I talk to the cops, they leave.
Then Derick, Krystal, Ashton (Krystal's boyfriend), Ashton's friend, and I started walking down the road looking, because I want my phone back. We see Mike a few roads over, when he sees us, he runs. So we start making our way back. Back at the house, the cops come and tell us they haven't seen him, then leave. Once inside, Mike comes back, still hysterical. Yelling how he wants his phone, blaming Darien (Jones picked up Darien) saying he did something with it. I told him he threw it outside and he said he didn't. Yes he did, I remember him on the porch slamming it into his skull then throwing it in the yard.
I told him I wanted my damn phone before he got his, but he kept yelling and screaming, saying he didn't have my phone, which I KNOW he did. We kept telling him to calm down, but he just wouldn't. I got pissed off that he wouldn't tell me where my phone was and I chunked his out the back door and told him he could find it in the back yard. I wish I smashed his damn phone now though. We found half the phone cover in the house next to the front door. This afternoon we found the battery(back piece) in the middle of the road.
I KNOW he did something with it. He can lie about it as much as he fucking wants, I know he took the bitch. Derick and I have searched roads and searched yards and I think it's lost hope finding the rest of it. The storm might have washed it down the road into a gutter... Our road turn into a river, so it's very possible. Yesterday when we would try to call it, it would ring twice, then voicemail. It can't ring without the battery. Today we find the battery in the middle of the road, and calling it only results in straight to voicemail, which means it was in one piece when Mike took it last night. I guess he decided to destroy evidence or he just felt like breaking my shit.
It was more than just a phone. That was like one of my most valued possessions. I hardly ever even talk to anyone on it.
Mostly when I do it's my parents 95% of the time, cause I like to keep a close bond with then. I had so many pictures (200+) and 100+ ringtones I made, it had a $70 memory card, a 2 year plan... My dad got it for me, and now he still has to pay $100+ each moth for that plan, phone or no phone. It was a fucking $200 phone, full of treasured memories and photos. Plus I had countless numbers in there of many old friends, along with important phone numbers... I'll never get those numbers back, those photos back, those memories... I had a picture of my mom and dad on there, holding Otis and Sage.... which both pets are dead now... and I really loved that photo... it just really hurts...
Why would he do such a thing? He said I was his best friend. If he really considered me so, why wouldn't he listen to me... why wouldn't he calm down and talk to me calmly... why did he say so many horrible things about my husband and I.... why would he verbally attack me so... why did he hurt me?.....
Why?!?!?.........
He said no one cared about him... If no one cared, he would have been gone a long fucking time ago... We given him so many chances with his emotional manic depressive angry outbursts and issues. He just doesn't seem to realize it. I've covered for him so many times... I believed him when he told me about voices in his head and one named "Nimrah". I understand that shit. He obviously can't see how much everyone especially I DO fucking care. It's just too much. I've tried the best I can, everyone else has to. He can't see how much we've tried and supported him, then what's the point? We haven't been able to do any help, even with how much we've tried, so fuck it. Enough is enough, and I'm sorry. Derick didn't enjoy hitting Mike... he did it because Mike hurt me. Derick's just as upset as me, and I can't even imagine how Darien must feel. We're all feeling hurt and pain now.... I wish I could say Mike, come back and live with us, but I can't... It's been too much, and we've tried all we could. I'm sorry, and I still care about Mike. We all do. But it's time we begin looking out for ourselves when it's become painfully obvious we can't do anything to help Mike. We've tried all we could. It's over now.... Painfully over.......
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